That’s a Secret I’ll never tell ;)

It’s funny how inspiration strikes you hardest when you’re completely uninspired. It’s funnier still how breakups are the most opportune moments to re evaluate your life and find a sense of purpose in it. It’s hardly rocket science to see where this blog comes from.

As is evident, I was nursing a broken heart and wallowing in on dollops of self pity when a friend of mine sent me a forward of the “Secret troll”. For the uninitiated, here is a link to it.

Welcome – New

Of course, I’m not a staunch believer of Self help books nor do I enthusiastically participate in the “lets meditate for a brighter future” mumbo jumbo. I did what most people do under the circumstances. Glanced through the mail and relegated it to a corner in my inbox.

When you’ve had a break up, if you’ve ever been un-“lucky” to have one, you’d realize that you suddenly have so much time on hand and so little to do.No calls to distract you, no fights to irk you, no whats app messages to reply to, you just don’t have a “busy” life anymore and that’s when you start re-reading the forwards in your inbox. Since the “Secret Troll” was the freshest of all the forwards I’d received, it was the first one I chanced upon.

The home page had stories of people who had been affected by the Secret in a positive way and that is the first one I read and like any non-believer, my first reaction was to dismiss it as a hoax.

But I was bored, remember? So I thought, “What the heck, let’s get started”. I got myself the e-book and started reading it and from then on I’ve been hooked.

I’m certainly not recommending it to anyone but I must state here that I’ve been pretty and I mean “PRETTY” positive post my marathon book reading session of “The Secret”. It just has a simple thought process which I thought I should share. After all, anything that requires minimum effort and maximum output requires a consideration right?

If i had to sum up the book in a single phrase it would go something like this. “Like begets like”.

“Come on!! We all know that”, you might chorus. Most certainly we do.At least in theory. But what about in principle? What if all you had to do was to think “happy funny thoughts”. By the above principle, you’ll attract “happy funny thoughts”. Isn’t that worth the effort? There’s nothing like smiling to yourself. It riles the crap out of people and that’s so worth the effort:) 

I’ve been following this thought process for a week now and from the looks of it, this is a Secret that’ll stay with me for a long time.

 

And then there were none…

My country has been witnessing nationwide protests seeking amendments to the archaic laws dealing with rape, sexual harassment and other heinous crimes. I just wanted to vent my angst and my sense of insecurity at the way we are moving forward as a community,through this blog. This post is by no means a sexist one blaming the men for all the woes the women folks face. Nor is this a preachy one filled with moral policing. I just came across a brilliantly written article on the topic and I thought it apt to share it here to dispel some myths about the victims of rape and also throw in a few words about its perpetrators.

For those who are interested in reading the article, below is the link it.

“I Fought For My Life…And Won” – Sohaila Abdulali #mustread #Vaw #Rape

I’ve seen a lot of my male friends squirm when subject to whistles and hoots by the female  folks even when done in jest. It makes them go all ruddy in the face. Many men are uncomfortable when a reference is made to a penis or crotch. They will never look you in the eye while having a conversation involving the above. Lots of them avoid going to places flocked by the fairer sex because they feel singled out there.

Women , the world over, are subject to such incidents almost everyday, both by people known to them and by those they don’t know. So many of them face brutality of at the hands of their perpetrators.Spare them a thought. Sensitize yourself, your folks, your friends, your kids, people around you to respect another individual irrespective of his or her gender. It is shameful that an individual had to face a brutal act of such magnitude for a lot of us to take notice of the prevalence and the pervasiveness of rape/sexual harassment .Let us not lose another life to this battle. Otherwise, soon there will be none…

Everything is fair in love and war

Ping alert.I looked at my monitor and at the right hand corner I could see gtalk alerting me to a new message.It happened to be from a very close friend of mine who I call my “soundboard”, for obvious reasons.I open the message and see a link to Facebook.

“What is this?”

“Check it and let me know your thoughts”.

“No comments”,”What nonsense is this?”, “What’s happening?” are never appropriate responses to such statements.

Without further ado I open the link and I’m immediately lead to some gentleman’s profile.

I know now what this conversation is all about so I admire his profile picture for a while, check out his likes and dislikes and see If we know anyone in common besides my friend . When I think I’m adequately equipped with data to reply to my friend, I proceed to the chat window to have a virtual conversation.

“He’s decent. Should I be interested?”

“Yes. He’s a colleague of mine and I’ve shared your profile with him too 🙂 ”

“Oh gosh. You devil ! What you going to do next?”

“Exchange numbers, of course”.

I’m single and so is he. I trust my friend’s choice and give her a go ahead.

Thus started a friendship last year , which has lasted to date.

Cut to the present.

Since we practically speak every day , everyone around me knows he exists and assumes we are a couple. I’m not averse to the idea so I let them talk.

My best friend is job hunting and I introduce her to this gentleman about a couple of weeks ago.( I must add here that she is a very attractive lady). The oldest story ever known to mankind is then played out. Voila! He is attracted to her.

My best friend is feeling victimized , he is oblivious to our emotional upheavals and is planning to officially ask my friend out on a date and I feel like a total jerk who had comfortable parked her rear on a balloon that someone just deflated.

I want to feel happy for my friend but I genuinely don’t feel like congratulating her at the moment.Pleople bombard me with queries about him and I try to scoot the minute I sense that the conversation is veering towards him.

I am aware of the fact that the scales tipped in her favour because she is more attractive than I am and this is making me horribly angry because it is a factor I cannot control. My ego has taken a trip downtown and has decided to abandon me and have self-pity adopt me instead.

Show me the person who said everything is fair in love and war!!!

 

 

 

 

Peter or Dilbert Anyone?

Puffing and panting and cursing under my breath, I made a dash to the meeting room, out of breath and nearly about to collapse on my manager. Apart from him, I could not see any of my colleagues in the room. Panic stricken, I wondered if I had missed the status meeting. Unable to contain my curiosity, I blurted “Is the meeting over?”

He smirks. “Do you ever check you emails?” he asks condescendingly.

How I wish I had indeed collapsed on him and struck him, while I was at it!

Carrying a laptop, that weighed almost as much as I did, I walked to my cubicle, feeling all heavy hearted and blue.

“The dork has cancelled the meeting, this morning”, I muttered to myself.

All he had to do was to message the team about the cancellation of the meeting, from a phone whose bills were anyway footed by the organization and yet he chose not to. Looking for an outlet to my frustrations, I turned to my colleagues but they had made peace with the situation and were busy attacking the problems at hand.

Knowing certainly well that I would not be able to meet my commitments for the day if I were whining about his insensitivity, I picked up the newspaper to distract my mind. Lo behold, it was the Dilbert comic strip jostling for my attention. Then it struck! Peter Principle and Dilbert Principle!

For the uninitiated, Peter Principle simply states that an employee is eventually promoted to his level of incompetence where he can do the least bit of damage so that the actual work can be accomplished by his subordinates. Dilbert Principle is more satirical in saying that the incompetent ones are usually promoted to minimize the damage they can possibly do to the organization.

That did it. I felt light hearted immediately. Feeling mighty pleased with Peter and Dilbert for their profound Principles; I got my coffee mug filled and walked back to my cubicle.

“Nothing like coffee to beat your Morning blues huh?” he asked.

“Get back to work quickly. We’ve got targets to meet” he added for good measure.

Peter and Dilbert paid my mind a visit again. I grinned and allowed them in.

In-NO-cence

The other day I was asked to baby sit my niece. Physically drained, mentally exhausted, all I really wanted to do was to stretch my legs and sip on a mug of piping hot tea while watching my niece go about her business.

Like any six year old, I assumed that my niece would love to get her hands dirty and unleash her creativity on paper and so I asked her to paint something she loved. Leaving her to her thoughts, I went in to make myself some tea. To say that I was left dumbfounded when i returned, would be to put it mildly. There,nicely perched on a couch, was my Smart Alec, painting on Microsoft Paint!!

My thoughts were in a disarray and I was almost about to drop my mug. Do kids today really equate painting with MS Paint? I felt like an imbecile. If i were asked about a decade ago, to paint, I would have promptly rushed to my room to pick up a brush and some colors.

I have to admit that the kids today are far more well turned out than my generation could ever be . My niece for instance, is my sounding board.From my crushes to my professional woes, from my weight issues to my bad hair days, she’s incredibly pragmatic when shooting advises. In comparison, I look like a retard who just happened to age physically.

While the wonderment is all there, I do think to myself, at times, if the kids are better off being blissfully ignorant about life and it’s ways for a wee bit longer. Have we traded their innocence for precociousness?

Twice bitten never shy??

It’s funny how a lot of us keep fretting over a lack of love life while a few lucky(seriously??) ones manage to find not one but two “loves” to keep them engaged..

Unable to withstand the boredom at work today, I thought it wise to call up my BFF and harp on about the lack of zing in my life especially after my break up.Picking up my phone, I walked dully to the pantry on my floor. At that very opportune moment, a colleague of mine walked in looking all bright and sunny. Feeling uncomfortable in the presence of someone whose life certainly looked a lot chirpier than mine, I managed a weak smile at her and decided against making that phone call, while in her presence.

After indulging in some small talk, we were both getting our fill of caffeine, when another colleague walked in and the two of them got busy chatting up, oblivious to my presence.

With my curiosity piqued, i decided to linger on for a while, pretending to be absorbed in my thoughts while sipping coffee. Unmindful of my presence, they chalked up a plan for the evening and left, to pick up their belongings and call it a day.

Here I was whining about my personal life (or the lack of it) and ahead of me walked two colleagues , both blissfully committed to other individuals but who were so large hearted that they could accommodate a few more to reside in there.

Left me wondering why some of us have trouble holding onto one relationship,while others skillfully juggle several..